You’ve been “Selected”
Please tell me I’m not the only one that finds these credit card offers funny (in a sad kind of way).
“Dear Mr. Smith,The road to financial success has many milestones marking how far you’ve come. You’ve just reached one such milestone.
You’ve been Selected for the American Express Preferred Rewards Gold Card
You should know that Selected status is not easily achieved. But with your excellent financial record, our decision was really very simple – we want you as a Card member.”
“Selected” status is not easily achieved? Give me a break. All they mean by “excellent financial record” is that you have a high FICO (a.k.a. “I Love Debt”).
“Dear Mr. Jones,Congratulations are in order. You’ve earned an important distinction – a Card that reflects your achievements and complements your life. A Card designed to reward you and bring you the extra service and privileges you require.”
A card designed to bring you the privileges you require? Aren’t privileges by definition things that are not required?
VISA Terms & Conditions:
“You authorize us to allocate your payments and credits in a way that is most favorable to or convenient for us. For example, you authorize us to apply your payments and credits to balances with lower APRs (such as promotional APRs) before balances with higher APRs.”
“…in a way that is most favorable to or convenient for us.” Well, there you go. Letting you know right up front where there priorities are. Good to know they’re looking out for the customer!
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April 17th, 2008 at 7:48 am
I agree. I find them hilarious. But, I must say I haven’t read one in a while. I don’t even open them, just tear them up and throw them away. Although, i do get a kick out of the commercials on tv.
April 17th, 2008 at 7:52 am
My Financial Peace University class was collecting credit card offers and I had to add up all the debt they avoided. On some of those offers you really have to get into the fine print to find how much you’ve been approved for.
We actually don’t get them anymore because we opted out of the pre-screen offers.
April 17th, 2008 at 12:13 pm
We shred offers on a nearly daily basis. What’s with these people? Within days of breaking a certain milestone (paying OFF a credit card) we received an offer from said card that graciously UPPED our credit (spending) limit by thousands of dollars. As if the machine noticed we weren’t spending anymore and therefore wanted to tempt us with more debt… The Staples MailMate is one of the best investments…ever. Deej got it as a Christmas gift and joyfully shreds those offers every day, including the stupid plastic cards that they come with. How do you opt out of pre-screen offers?? That sounds fantastic.
April 17th, 2008 at 1:15 pm
Oh, it’s super easy and quick. Go to https://www.optoutprescreen.com and click the link at the bottom to Opt-Out. The online request is good for five years but they also have a form you can mail-in to opt-out forever.